When I was a child I didn't have many friends. At least not among other children. I was
a very shy and quiet person. To say I had trust issues would be an understatement. Loud
people and fighting, not including the daily brawls I got into with my brother, made me run
the other way. My favorite thing to do was to find a nice secluded place and read. Since
I had a very active imagination, you would most likely find me daydreaming or making up
stories of my own. To most children my age, I was too quiet and serious. To me, they
were too noisy and mean. I got picked on a lot because I was smaller and different from
the others. Children can be very mean to those that don't fit in.
My family loved animals. We always had dogs and cats. Usually, there was at least one
litter of kittens or puppies. I have been drawn to animals my whole life. To tell the truth,
I have spent most of my life surrounded by them. The outdoor animals were my main
chore when I was little. I fed and watered them, cleaned up their spaces, made sure
they were ok. I spent more time with them than with the humans in my life. They were
my friends and they never let me down. They taught me so much.
They taught me that true friends don't need to say a word. You can just spend hours
together, not really doing anything, just enjoying being together. I learned friends will
be there for you through thick and thin. When I had been picked on at school or I
felt like I would never fit in, I poured my problems out to them. They would sit there
and listen, concern and understanding shining in their eyes. That taught me that listening
was sometimes more important than talking. There will be times a friend doesn't need
or want you to say anything, they just need to get things off of their chests.
They taught me to always be glad to see someone I loved. I learned to tell and show
the people I cared about that I loved them every chance I got. Every time I went to
the backyard, I knew that I was loved. I learned that family protects their own. One
day one of the neighborhood dogs wandered into the yard and started a fight with
one of our smaller dogs. I heard the fighting and ran out the door to see what was
happening. Before I could reach them, our "guard cat" had jumped onto the other
dog's head and started attacking. She fought like a little fury and the other dog ran
away with her clinging to his back. A few minutes later the cat come back and
nudged our dog, as if to let him know the danger was gone. Luckily he was not
badly hurt and he got to his feet. The cat sniffed him and then went on her way.
The other dog never entered our yard again.
The most important lesson the animals taught me was that birth and death were a
part of life. I watched many dogs and cats being born into this world. When I was
six, I saw the first dog I claimed as "mine" being born. She was the runt and I have
always chosen the runt of the litter. Runts are almost always the one with the biggest
personality. They are just my favorites. Ten years later, I held my precious baby in
my lap as she took her last breaths. Rocking her, I sang to her and thanked her for
all the joy she brought into my life. Quietly and peacefully, she passed out of my life,
taking a piece of my heart with her. I fought when they tried to take her out of my
arms, not wanting to let her go. I wouldn't let anyone-else dig her grave. I choose
a spot under the cherry tree where we had spent so many lovely moments. Even
today, I cry when I think about her. But I also smile, remembering all that we shared.
Death is painful but time does ease the pain. For the longest time, I did not want
another dog. I didn't want to feel that heartbreak again. Then one day, I looked
into eyes that were so much like hers and my heart melted. Right now, the owner
of those eyes is curled up on my bed fast asleep. I love her just as much and I
know I'll miss her when she's gone. But I also know that another little bundle of
fur will come along and steal my heart.
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