My Sanctuary

***** Some times you have ideas and they just flit through your mind. If you don't jot them down as

soon as you have them, they vanish, never to visit you again. Then there are the ideas that just will

not leave your head. You sit down to write a perfectly lovely little story and here comes that stray

idea, buzzing like an annoying fly in your mind. You do everything you can to make it leave but it

simply refuses to leave your mind until you bring it to life on the page. So here goes. It is a very

silly idea and my only defense is that I have a cold or the flu. Forgive me for this silly piece of fluff,

but don't say I didn't warn you. Proceed with caution. *****

     I sit at my computer, vainly trying to focus on the words in front of me. Its no use. Everything is

starting to blur together. I've lost track of the hours I've spent putting in job applications. My neck

is stiff and my back is cussing me out. After two months of the same thing, I'm starting to give up

hope. Jobs are hard to come by and most of those I see posted require a degree or experience.

Having never gone to college, that's one strike against me. Most of my jobs have been in retail,

another strike against me. Most of the retail jobs go to the younger people. They can pay them

less and give part-time hours, whereas I need full-time hours and some benefits.

     My head throbs and my chest feels like I swallowed a bag of cotton balls or steel wool pads.

The room starts to spin and I fall back into my chair. I hate feeling like this. Being sick just flat-out

sucks. I don't like not being in control of my body and that makes me a mean person to be around.

I am currently hiding from the other people in the house so I won't be a bitch to them. Normally, I

am the nicest person you will ever meet. But when I am sick, it is like a switch is flipped and I become

a totally different person. I don't like myself when I am sick and would leave if I could but I can't.

     Maybe a nice hot shower will make me feel better. It couldn't hurt. A nice hot shower where the
water is hot enough to melt the flesh off of my bones. Well, maybe not that hot but the bathroom will
be full of steam when I'm done. Yes, a shower seems like a very good idea right now. I walk out
of my bedroom and open the door to the bathroom. I enter into my sanctuary and lock the door behind me.

     I think the greatest invention of all time is indoor plumbing. I feel sorry for all the generations that did
not have it and am grateful I was born after this invention. Before indoor plumbing, you took a bath in
a ice-cold pond or river. Or you lugged countless buckets of water from the creek and waited for them
to heat up on the stove. Now you can just turn a knob and you have cold water. Turn another knob and
you have hot water. So simple, but we use it every day and never think about what a marvel it is.

     I take off my clothes and stepped into the shower, pulling the smiley-face shower curtain shut behind me.
Leaning down, I turn the knob for the cold water to where just a small trickle will come out. What the h*@#! Apparently, I didn't push the shower lever all the way down the last time I took a shower. Cold
water dripped onto my head as I hurriedly pushed the lever down. The water stopped falling on my head.
A small stream of water flowed from the faucet. I turned the hot water knob to full blast and let the water
heat up. Ah, there we go, just slightly under three-degree burn temperature. I pull the level up and stood to
let the water cascade over me.

     For me, one of life's greatest joys is a hot bath or shower. The water soothes me and calms me. As I
stand and let the water flow over me, the cares and worries of the day just melt away. I am alone and
peace surrounds me. The bills and concerns about money don't exist. As the water pounds my body, I'm
not worried about a job or where I'll come up with the money to go back to school to become a vet
tech assistant. My muscles relax under the velvet touch of the water and I can see my first novel with
my name on the cover. I see my mom healthy and as she was before the dementia claimed her and we
had to put her in a nursing home. My back arches as the spray hits the small of my back, heat kneading
the knot of tension that is centered there away. My world is simple and carefree for a few precious moments. I breathe in the steam and the congestion in my chest eases just a tiny bit. I stand under the
healing water until it begins to turn lukewarm. Then I turn the water off, careful to turn the shower lever to
the off position this time. I take a deep breath and exit the shower.

     I linger in the bathroom, not wanting to leave my sanctuary. Perched on the side of the bathtub, I let the steam flow into my lungs, breaking up some of the congestion. Using a fluffy tan towel I dry my body and pull on clean clothes. My head is somewhat clearer but I'm still not at 100%. I pull off the clothes I just put on and reach for my pj's. It may still be early but I think I'll call it an early night. My body cries for sleep and
for once, I will heed the call. I go into my bedroom and turn off the computer. The job search can continue tomorrow. Calm and relaxed from my shower, I seek my bed. I tumble in and pull the covers up to my neck. I curl up and closed my eyes. I'll pick my worries and cares tomorrow. Sleep steals over me and wings me far away.

****I hope this wasn't too silly. Some times my mind goes strange places and all I can do is follow. Feel free to comment on this piece.****